June is the month when we celebrate Father’s Day, and I dedicate this month’s column to my late dad, an avid golfer and one who found “serenity now” on the fairways.
June is also Men’s Mental Health Awareness Month. This is a time to bring light to the struggles men face, and the ways they choose to seek peace, connection, and healing. We don’t often find men in meditation circles or at spiritual retreats. Many men have discovered their own retreat at a place you might not expect: the golf course.
I’ve seen this in my own life. My father certainly wasn’t a meditator. Those that know him would laugh at picturing him sitting in a yogic pose, chanting to bring about inner peace with eyes closed. He was anything but calm and peaceful. He would often say, “I can’t calm down, I’m Italian!” He didn’t talk about “mental health” or “mindfulness,” and he probably couldn’t have told you what a grounding practice was, but could tell you about ground-ball practice.
Whether he was aware of it or not, something deep in his soul knew that being out on the golf course calmed something inside him. Being obsessed with golf was an understatement. It was more of a deep longing. The rhythm of walking the fairway, the focus of lining up a shot, the silence between swings, and the connection to nature were what helped him feel well.
Looking back now, I can see how golf was his form of mindfulness. It was his spiritual practice. It’s where he connected to something bigger, his version of God, peace, and clarity.
And, I don’t think he’s alone. Men in general are less likely to talk about emotions or mental challenges or seek help with a counselor or therapist. It may be because admitting they need help and reaching out for support carries a sense of shame, guilt, or weakness. Whether it’s because of family history or their own internal wiring, many men carry stress, anxiety, and sadness alone in silence.
But that doesn’t mean they aren’t seeking relief. It may mean that they are finding it in their own way. And for many, that way is through golf.
Many men, including my father, carry a heavy mental load. They face pressure to provide, perform, and keep it all together, yet rarely talk about it. While women often reach out to friends or seek counseling, men are more likely to stay silent, even as they manage work stress, financial strain, family responsibilities, and buried emotional wounds. Just because they don’t always articulate what they’re feeling doesn’t mean they aren’t feeling it deeply.
Golf is a mindfulness practice, without calling it that. Mindfulness is the practice of being fully present and focused on the current moment, without letting your thoughts wander to anything else. While many of us do this through meditation or breath work, mindfulness can show up anywhere — at a meditation center, on a yoga mat, in a forest, by the lake or on a golf course.
When men golf, they naturally engage in mindfulness, often without realizing it:
- Focused attention. Every shot demands their full presence. They aren’t worrying about emails or to-do lists. They’re focused on how they hold the club, yardage, slope, breath, posture, and precision.
- Rhythm and routine. The act of walking, swinging, and resetting creates a meditative pattern that grounds the nervous system.
- Time in nature. Being surrounded by trees, grass, critters, and the sun is incredibly healing. The natural world regulates our nervous systems and lifts our mood.
- Social connection. Golf allows for companionship without intensity. Conversations happen naturally, with silence in between. For many men, this is ideal.
- Mental reset. Stepping away from daily life, even for a few hours, gives the brain a chance to reset and recharge.
This is exactly what my dad experienced. He didn’t call it mindfulness or therapy. But when he was on the course, I could see it in his face, his walk, his energy. He was lighter. He was grounded. He was free.
There’s also something sacred about the game of golf. It’s a solo journey, as spiritual journeys usually are. Although it can be shared at times, the alone time is what helps us feel and heal. Golf is both a challenge and a surrender. You can’t control everything — the wind, the lie of the ball, the unexpected foursome playing slowly ahead of you — but you adjust and keep going. And that is just like our lives.
For many men, the golf course is the one place to give themselves permission to exhale, to reflect, to feel, and to simply be. It’s where they pause the constant “doing” and connect with something deeper, even if they don’t call it prayer. On the fairway, they hear their own inner voice, their heart rate slows, and they reconnect with who they are beyond the roles they carry every day.
As I look back now, I think of my dad in heaven walking the 18th hole, with the sun setting, and the blue sky wide open in front of him. I think of him looking out over the fairway, content, holding his favorite Callaway driver, trying to beat his last score of 57. That was his church, where he experienced well-being.
As a wellness coach, speaker, and daughter, I believe we need to change our view of what mental health care looks like, especially for men. It doesn’t have to be talk therapy (though that’s wonderful and has so many benefits). It doesn’t have to be meditation or group sessions (those are my go-tos for help). It can be riding a motorcycle, a lifting weights, hiking on a trail, or playing a round of golf. (If you’re like my dad, you really want to improve your mental health and play 36 holes; I think he was really working things out! :)) Whatever helps a man feel more grounded, connected, and at peace with himself, that counts as mental health care.
This month, let’s check in with the men in our lives and ask how they’re doing. Remind them that rest, joy, and being present aren’t luxuries but essential to their health and well-being. If “well-being” feels like a strange word to them, ask them if they’ve been out on the golf course lately, because maybe that’s where they remember how to breathe and reconnect with themselves.
To all the men out there, and my father in heaven, take care of your mental health and well-being this month of Father’s Day and hit the links!
A belated Happy Fathers Day and keep thriving!
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